June 2010
30 posts
Time keeps on slipping slipping into...
The Passage of Time: Time and time again I hear people discussing how fast time seems to be going. They have a whole range of theories as to why this seems to be happening, from the speeding up of the general exploding outwards that is the Universe, to end of the world alien intervention. Years and years ago I remember my granny saying, “Oh Christopher, just look at you. Haven’t you...
“Listen, if I was to lay my dick on my computer’s keyboard it would stretch...”
– Christopher England just winked and said that!
“I can’t believe that the Co-op is actually able to produce an own brand that is...”
– Christopher England just slobbered that!
“Name 3 things you could do with 30,000 sheets of freshly printed headed...”
– Christopher England just kinda asked that!
And god so loved, erm, nobody?
With love and respect to the victims of the recent earthquake, the tsumami, or the humans that are destroyed on mass by cyclones or any other natural disasters, and inspired (if that’s the right word) me to think about them, let’s talk about these natural disasters. As in, earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanic eruptions, tornadoes, hurricanes, cyclones, etc., etc. When the initial time spent telling...
Why people hate commercial radio
Why does commercial radio do everything so boringly? What are they afraid of? Here’s an example of some programming elements and how they are put together by the BBC or how they’d be put together by the commercial sector.
Ok, let’s have: A 15 minute news bulletin, followed by 3 records as good as segued back-to-back. Before that let’s have a presenter coming to the end...
July will be mega-wet. Or will it?
As I’ve mentioned before, I have limited trust in any organisation, like the Meteorological Office, that consistently fails to provide the service that they charge Millions of Pounds each year to provide. Despite their huge and expensive computer modelling equipment the Met Office has been unable to provide much more than a ‘now cast’ and certainly has been proved to be so bad...
The great water hysteria
A few years ago (before the years when it was doing nothing but non-stop raining!), we were having to watch mass hysteria in London. It was about water.
Apparently we needed to save it or the world would end.
We were given lots of advice about how to save it. Yeah, there’s the usual about not leaving a hose-pipe emptying non-stop into a garden – and that kind of makes sense – but the mad people...
Non-linear Universes
I dunno. That Professor Stephen Hawkin, eh? He’s a one. I mean, right, the information paradox that has blighted debates for over 30 years, yeah? You know, the idea that information disappears in a black-hole versus the idea that information continues. What a debate, eh? So, right, he now comes out with this theory of alternative universes based on alternative histories, and only the one...
“Ok, ‘Moist’ wipes for one’s bottom I can accept. It’s probably cleaner than...”
– Christopher England just said that!
Emergency radio
Reading through the ‘Preparing for Emergencies’ book we all got quite a while ago, I notice that I have to gather up my belongings and along with a load of spare batteries, I need to have with me a portable radio. Indeed, I also have to make sure I know how to tune in to my ‘local radio station’. As a radio anorak, I think I know how to do that. However, I’m slightly puzzled about the lack...
How to reduce your radio audience
How to reduce your audience if you run a radio station: Tell your presenters not to say anything but to play all the songs in bunches of three or four at a time back to back (segued). They must play in whatever order the computer’s playout program spews them out, regardless of whether or not they all fit together nicely. Ideally, the main program used to decide the rotation should have been...
Who are 'The Borg'?
‘The Borg’ is a name given to the large corporate groups who operate the networked non-adventurous radio services. Why are they called ‘The Borg’?
‘The Borg’ are a species from the Star Trek universe. They travel around the universe finding worlds, such as Earth, and attacking and ‘assimilating’ the species inhabiting the worlds, such as ‘humans’. They take with them some of the technology...
“About a year ago, Liverpool’s main newspaper (there are two, both from the...”
– Christopher England just printed that!
Why media obsesses about Israeli-Palestinian stuff
Ex-MP, TV presenter and newspaper columnist Matthew Parris was on a recent BBC1 Question Time programme when the obvious questions came up about the Israeli boarding of the aid flotilla. Very interestingly, rather than have an arrogant opinion on the matter and the whole conflict, he said he was bored with it all. He said there were plenty of other places in the world with equal or worse...
Chris Evans and his TV set
I never really liked Chris Evans on the radio other than when he was first on GLR. I thought he was good on the Big Breakfast TV show, and liked the original TGI Friday shows (got bored by the end), and was a complete anorak of the Don’t Forget Your Toothbrush series, but radio, no. He represented that loud uncaring Britpop focussed binge drinking self-obsessed liberal elite of Labour voting...
May 2010
31 posts
It's time to free Gaza
There are regimes around the world where the tribes ruling an area treat the tribes not ruling the area with such a level of hatred and cruelty that the average Western society chattering classes shut it out of their minds. They dismiss any thoughts about it because the whole country is labelled as being ‘underdeveloped’, almost sub-human, and unable to know better.
Now and again reaction does...